I hate goodbyes...

Tonight I hung out with my friend Julie who is moving to Japan in a little over a week. She and I have been friends for six years and through it we have had our highs and lows but out of those ups and downs has grown a friendship that I've really learned to appreciate. She is someone I know I can trust with anything and who I'd give my life for in a heartbeat. I know more than anything she wants me to be happy and deep down inside I want the same for her. A few years ago she had another opportunity to go to Japan and I discouraged it and later on she ended up not going. She has never said I was directly the reason that she didn't go but she hinted at it a few times. I've kept my mouth shut this time and I know she is going to love it but wow, there is going to be a void. Through the last five years she has worked at Disneyland and in general, if I was in the park, I would make sure and visit her parades no matter what. Most of those years were spent watching her as a dragonfly in Parade of the Stars or an Elf or something in the Christmas Parade...for awhile she did Mickey and Minnie too...and seeing her perform in those roles really made Disneyland magical for me. I'm sure it'll be fine not seeing her every week and I know I have friends around now that want to support me and see me happy who aren't going to Japan...it's just not the same without the level of trust and loyalty that is built through six years. Saying goodbye to her tonight and hugging her and looking in her eyes telling her that I love her and really meaning it was one of the hardest things I've ever had to do. I could feel this ache in the back of my throat, and pressure behind my eyes but I remained strong to the best of my ability. I'm not really sure why...I really hope things go well for her in Japan. It's an incredible opportunity...but the walk away from her was the worst ever. I really don't know why. I do know though that friendships like those are worth more than any treasure or any weight of gold and I'm so blessed to have her in my life. I suppose that is enough rambling tonight. I should get to bed and see what tomorrow brings. Whatever it does I need to just keep reminding myself to always look on the bright side of life.